Thursday, December 07, 2006

INTERRUPTION! - Captain Picard's Christmas Party

Captain Picard's Christmas Party!

I stood on the Enterprise. Captain Picard one of the men I did Last Gladiator Standing with had invited me. It was his Christmas Party. I do not celebrate the Earth Tradition of Christmas. It is lost on me. But I understand their need for it.

It’s a religious ceremony of some kind that was corrupted by the corporations of the world to be a holiday of materialistic value only. It amazes me how for thousand of years a tradition survived.

As was custom on their planet, I brought the one who invited me a present; It was a lightsaber, in a box about twenty sizes too large for it, and it was packed tightly do it made no sound when rattled.

I made sure to put it with the other presents, it was marked, “To The Good Captain, from Erifia Apoc.” I then searched for my host, he was going to be a very, very busy. I found him mingling, and I smiled and tipped my head.

“Happy Christ Mast,” I said to him.

“Christmas, Miss Apoc. And Merry Christmas is the proper term,” He responded and he gave me a hug and a kiss on both cheeks.

“Merry Christmas then Captain,” I said with a smile.

“To you as well, Miss Apoc… I would love to speak to you more-“

“But you’re very busy. I understand. I got you a very special present, I hope you enjoy it.”

I had heard many times in my galaxy about a group known as borg. So I sought a member of this race. I found one. She was avoiding contact with other people. And she was flanked by two borg men; or at least I think they were borg men. I approached. She was of some important because my approach made the guards tense.

I bowed, “Are you a borg?” I asked.

“I am the Queen of the Borg,” she responded.

“Forgive me for not respecting your position, I was unaware.”

“I do not understand why all people cannot be like you. You are a fascinating being yourself. I’ve never seen one of your kind before. Would you be interested in Assimilating?”


“The object in general is to put you into the collective. To enchance you with technology from the other races, and to take your strengths into the hive-mind. What do your tails do?”

“It’s complicated, they act like extra brains.”

“Really, I will give you signing bonuses and a planet of your choice.”

“I’m a Jedi too.”

“Really!?” She seemed ecstatic. She was bubbling, “Anything else I should know about you?”

“I don’t know; I’m a different race on my father’s side, way, way, up there.”

“Which one?”

“Species 8472.”

“Get away!” She hissed.

I did as ordered. I decided to speak with Guinan. I seemed to remember speaking to her a couple of times before. So I sat and spent the rest of my time with her. She wasn’t as popular as some of the other guests.

If you’ll excuse me, I am going to get smashed,

Hugs and Kisses,
Erifia Apoc


Blogger Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Ah, a wonderful party. I can't wait to see what happens when I get there. ;-)

11:23 AM  
Blogger cooltopten said...

cool party , at least no one got drunk and put the ship into hyper drive on a collision course for the nearest planet. cool blog :)

12:12 PM  
Blogger Dark Jedi Kriss said...

Sounds like it was a fun party. mostly.

11:00 PM  
Blogger Aayla Secura said...

Well that's just like you to find the person that wants to spend their time alone and ruin it for them. And to get as you put it smashed in front of them.

Erifia next thing you know the council will make you part of the Jedi Youngling Council too!

1:38 PM  
Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

The party wouldn't be the same without you, Erifia.

2:07 PM  
Blogger Professor Xavier said...

I'm not sure about that Borg girl. She kept staring at my chair. I think she thought I had cyborg wheels.

6:01 PM  

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