Tuesday, September 05, 2006

My Opinion about some of the Races of the galaxy

Besalisk – You can’t very well judge an entire race by only one. But Dexter Jettster is a hard act to follow. They are a four armed race… Who are very good with food. Really. I got nothing.

Bothans – My biggest competition. Me and these Mogs (Part Man, Part Dogs, they’re their own best friend) are at odds against everything. See in the republic, when you are spying, when you complete your mission, or get the disk from the enemy compound, or successfully assassinate the man you are after, instead of getting paid hourly, you get paid in bounties… And these guys do everything they can to make sure I don’t get it. I hate them, but that’s not to say I don’t respect them.

Droids – ‘Nough said. Me and these guys have a long history of hating each other. I kill them for glee. I would not think twice about cutting down your translator droid, or even a med droid. These guys are all bad news. Sexless, Emotionless, and Merciless. Oh how I love collecting their mother boards.

Ewok – These little tribal people are like wookies, except smaller, and less hairy. They know how to party, which is very important. They are amazing at Guerrilla Warfare, and some of them are a little Crazier than others. but in general these guys are pretty cool little dudes.

Gamorrean – In the infamous words of Aragorn. “Gentlemen lets hunk some Orc.” These big pig looking guys are pretty strong, but they can scarcely stand up to the raw power of the a light saber. So though I don’t really fear them, those of you whose midi-chlorian count isn’t very high, watch out for these guys.

Geonosian – Some of the biggest allies of the CIS, which therefore makes them some of my worst enemies. When I think about these guys, I want to get a flyswatter out and smash them like their tiny bug counterparts.

Gungan – Annoying! ANNOYING! A-N-N-O-Y-I-N-G! I am not one for the wiping out of an alien race, except droids and genosians, but the next one on my list would be these guys. They drive me up a wall. The sound of their voices make me want to get drunk and pass out. I have to say, Becca’s “I don’t Know.” Gets an 8 on the annoying scale of 1 – 10, but these guys, they get a 50. Just shoot me when they are around.

Humans - I find humans more than fascinating, I find them amazing... I mean seriously. Their will to survive and your adaptability is the most impressive I've ever seen.But they are kind of messy creatures with lots of hair Not as much as Wookies. But I only have eyebrows... And they stink sometimes... But that's not their fault... Well, okay, maybe it is, but the humans I am referring to now, don't stink, and by stink, I mean, smell. But like I said...
They have this soul, this spirit that lets them survive anything… I don’t know how they do it, but I am always impressed.

Hutts – I have met both Jabba and his nephew. I must say, I prefer the latter. Hutts are big fat worm like creatures. They are hard to understand and even harder to compromise with. I think Jabba is impressed with me. His nephew, We’ve only met at a party once, it was a handshake, “Hi I’m Erifia,” “Hi I’m Jaba Fat Boy,” kind of thing. But in general, as with all races, the female is superior to the male in intelligence, looks, and grace.

So there you go, more to be posted next time...

If you'll excuse me, I need to go accidently through Jar-Jar out a window, making him land on a droid and a genosian,

Hugs and Kisses (Except for Droids, Genosians, and Gungans)
Erifia Apoc

3 Comments:

Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

That's a fair summing up, Erifia.

1:47 PM  
Blogger Captain Typho said...

This is so racial.

12:19 AM  
Blogger Erifia Apoc said...

Think this is bad... Read the next one...

11:08 AM  

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