"Right now, I want to kill you..."
I felt her tugging at me… I couldn’t… There was too much pain. If I came back, I would just go unconscious again. Then I felt coolness all over me… My lekkus became cool. I opened my eyes.
“Are my lekkus okay?” I asked a little afraid of her answer.
“They’ll be tender for a while, but that too will pass in time,” she looked at me clearly distressed by something, she turned away from me, “Why are you here?”
“For you… You kind of left me hanging at the temple. The council was a little upset,” I laughed a bit, “So Master Yoda made me a master… How weird huh? I know you are a knight, but will you be my padawan until we can get that braid removed?”
“You’ll have to forgive me, Master! But I couldn’t control my emotions.” She cried softly “And I still can’t control them, not the way the council rules allows us to be.”
“Barriss, Barriss… Calm down… Its okay, its me. I’m your friend. I care about you. I love you. Sometimes you make me sad, sometimes mad, but you make me happy… You hear that? I feel emotion… Calm down Okay?”
She began to cry, She kept wiping her tears away, “You’re here to do the council’s will.”
I hushed her, “No Barriss. I’m here to make sure you are okay? You can talk to me.”
“Erifia, I’m not okay. I’m not even sure if I’ll ever be okay,” Barriss said slowly, “Right now I want to kill you, and I know that’s not right.”
“Why?” I asked, “I’m okay with you wanting to kill me, but tell me why. Give me a reason.”
“I don’t know!” she yelled, “I’ve tried everything I know and I still can’t find a reason as to why?”
“Then kill me,” I said calmly, “If you think you’ll get the answers that way. I’m very weak right now. I couldn’t fight you too terribly hard. I’ve been through a lot, I’ve wanted to kill everyone around me. I felt lost, I felt I didn’t deserve life, Barriss. You and I aren’t the same person. So I don’t know what you need to find your way. But if killing me will give you peace, then kill me.”
“No, Erifia I won’t kill you in this state,” she said, “if I was to kill you it would be a fair fight. Images of her dreams flashed before my eyes, there was death everywhere. I winced, “Why am I not where I need to be, Master?”
“Because you are afraid of where that path may lead you.” Where the frell did that come from?
She stared at me. Was I supposed to go on? That was the best I had.
If you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to come with something wise, post haste,
Anger and Rage (And its not me this time,)
Erifia Apoc
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Author’s Note: On my Radio Show today, I’ve got another blogger dedication.
To get there, go to 91.9 WCAL Power 92
My section of the show will be from 2-4, my co-host and I switch, and he’ll be on from 4 – 6, and My blogger dedication will be between 3 and 3:30.
All times are EST.
“Are my lekkus okay?” I asked a little afraid of her answer.
“They’ll be tender for a while, but that too will pass in time,” she looked at me clearly distressed by something, she turned away from me, “Why are you here?”
“For you… You kind of left me hanging at the temple. The council was a little upset,” I laughed a bit, “So Master Yoda made me a master… How weird huh? I know you are a knight, but will you be my padawan until we can get that braid removed?”
“You’ll have to forgive me, Master! But I couldn’t control my emotions.” She cried softly “And I still can’t control them, not the way the council rules allows us to be.”
“Barriss, Barriss… Calm down… Its okay, its me. I’m your friend. I care about you. I love you. Sometimes you make me sad, sometimes mad, but you make me happy… You hear that? I feel emotion… Calm down Okay?”
She began to cry, She kept wiping her tears away, “You’re here to do the council’s will.”
I hushed her, “No Barriss. I’m here to make sure you are okay? You can talk to me.”
“Erifia, I’m not okay. I’m not even sure if I’ll ever be okay,” Barriss said slowly, “Right now I want to kill you, and I know that’s not right.”
“Why?” I asked, “I’m okay with you wanting to kill me, but tell me why. Give me a reason.”
“I don’t know!” she yelled, “I’ve tried everything I know and I still can’t find a reason as to why?”
“Then kill me,” I said calmly, “If you think you’ll get the answers that way. I’m very weak right now. I couldn’t fight you too terribly hard. I’ve been through a lot, I’ve wanted to kill everyone around me. I felt lost, I felt I didn’t deserve life, Barriss. You and I aren’t the same person. So I don’t know what you need to find your way. But if killing me will give you peace, then kill me.”
“No, Erifia I won’t kill you in this state,” she said, “if I was to kill you it would be a fair fight. Images of her dreams flashed before my eyes, there was death everywhere. I winced, “Why am I not where I need to be, Master?”
“Because you are afraid of where that path may lead you.” Where the frell did that come from?
She stared at me. Was I supposed to go on? That was the best I had.
If you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to come with something wise, post haste,
Anger and Rage (And its not me this time,)
Erifia Apoc
* * * * * * * * * * * *
Author’s Note: On my Radio Show today, I’ve got another blogger dedication.
To get there, go to 91.9 WCAL Power 92
My section of the show will be from 2-4, my co-host and I switch, and he’ll be on from 4 – 6, and My blogger dedication will be between 3 and 3:30.
All times are EST.
posted by Erifia Apoc at 12:34 PM
5 Comments:
Wow. I am honored. It was great to hear my name on the radio. Just make sure the Council doesn't find out. ;D
Only a master for one day and you've already mastered the jargon. Not bad.
That is so cool, Nepharia! I heard it too! :-)
So did I, Nepharia!
Oh Erifia, not only that but I'm also scared too!
The 'why' isn't too importasnt, it's the prevention of getting killed that is!
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